The Real Winners of Super Bowl 53

'Winning is not a sometime thing; it's an all the time thing. You don't win once in a while... you don't do things right once in a while... you do them right all the time. Winning is habit'- Vince Lombardi

Ah, just realised there was a typo in last week's prediction for Super Bowl 53. By 'Los Angeles Rams shall defeat the New England Patriots by a single point', it was obviously meant to say 'Patriots to win by 10 points'. Must be something wrong with Blogger or the laptop; heck, 'Absolute Shambles' could have been the victim of a deplorable hacking attack from those darned Russians! Are any of you buying this? No? Well, can't blame a guy for trying. It appears that going on hope and extremely basic American football knowledge sadly doesn't defeat an extremely powerful sporting dynasty this time around.

Never seen that before (Sky News)

While it was disappointing to see the Rams fall short, what was even more disappointing was that this was the first Super Bowl in years that this humble blogger has failed to watch (some fan!). The desire to gain a good night's sleep was one too strong to ignore this time around, especially when you awaken at 3:30 in the morning to the sound of both mother and brother finally turning in after watching the game. As this blogger turned over and snuggled back down for a bit of extra sleep, one did wonder not just who won the game, but also on whether it was a game worth watching. Indeed, what else was missed? This is a viewing fiesta, with adverts battling for supremacy as if it was Christmas and a halftime show that has boasted incredible talent such as Michael Jackson, Beyoncé and Janet Jackson's nipple. Friends and family come together for such an extraordinary sporting event that traverses the goings-on transpiring on the field. It's a big one, to put it mildly. 

All hail the king (AP)

So this got the old brain into gear, and it came up with the question on 'Who were the real winners of Super Bowl 53?'. As already established, this goes beyond the final score after four '15 minute' quarters of athleticism and nail-biting action that makes grown men cry with either rage or delight. For those forced to sit down and witness the Super Bowl, the ad breaks, halftime show and potentially lucrative cuisine on offer is at hand to keep boredom in check. Those precious slots between plays and quarters have become a very expensive commodity over the years, with companies now pulling out all the stops to outdo their business rivals and snag some sweet deals. Alternatively, film and TV trailers just make their respective fan bases squeal with delight, but also anguish as it turns out they have to wait for 10,000 years for the next series. At least Game of Thrones is back in April.

Everyone stay calm (IGN)

While a fearsome battle rages in the stadium, interceded by the struggle between companies to create a buzz on social media, broadcasters are engaged in a deadly duel to emerge victorious in the arena of 'viewer numbers'. The American media take this day very seriously as a win in the ratings grants the victor bragging rights and will disguise any other shortcomings created by poor TV shows or lacklustre news. As the UK fully embraces American culture, both the BBC and Sky Sports grant the British public the chance to watch the odd sport that millions of Americans pledge their allegiance to. Although Sky have control over the normal showing of NFL fixtures, as well as the NBA, the BBC do hold the advantage of not having to cut to ad breaks all the time and can instead focus on punditry and bringing on special guests to dazzle the audience at home. Doesn't seem like a fair fight considering the BBC is free to watch, and the nation will surely back the British Broadcasting Company. Nothing like a good bit of terrestrial TV.

Wrong type of football, but can't turn down a piece of Gary Lineker (Telegraph)

Enough of this loveable but seemingly needless rambling; let's get on with this post! You all came here either to figure out who the real winners of Super Bowl 53 were or because this humble blogger has guilt-tripped you into reading this latest writing extravaganza. Regardless, it's time to note the triumphant parties on that fateful night in Atlanta, as destructive conflicts raged both on and off the field. Wow, sport really is too violent at times... but is it more lethal than video games? Think that might be a debate for another time, especially as one isn't ready to talk about Red Dead Redemption 2 just yet. It's too soon, man.

The League; horrendously underrated show

LET'S START WITH THE OBVIOUS

The title says it all, really. New England triumphed 13-3 and won their sixth title, affirming their dominance over the modern era of the NFL. In a game dominated by the defensive contingent, Tom Brady (New England QB) found his first pass of the game intercepted and leaving everyone wondering if it would be his night. Much to Brady's relief, the Rams offence never got going as New England's own defensive line made life difficult for QB Jared Goff. Going into the final quarter, the scores were tied at 3-3, so the footballing powers that be decided it was time for Patriots tight end Rob Gronkowski to catch a perfectly executed pass from Brady and set up the first (and only) touchdown of the game. Sony Michel's (New England running back) touchdown was enough to ensure a victory. Boom, done, end of story. 

Has Gronk played his last game? (SportingNews)

Having equalled the Pittsburgh Steeler's record of 6 championship wins, it is clear to see that Patriots coach Bill Belichick wants to be the man to win title number 7 and stamp New England's authority over the NFL. It would certainly be a monumental sporting achievement by any counts, on level with the career of Sir Alex Ferguson at Manchester United or Canadian supremacy in curling. Belichick is the oldest coach to ever win a Super Bowl at the age of 66, whilst also being the most successful. Tom Brady is now the most decorated player in NFL history as he surpassed Charles Haley and their joint record of 5 Super Bowl wins, and Julian Edelman (New England wide receiver) caught 10 passes for 141 yards on his way to being named the game's MVP and triggering a debate on whether to include him in the Hall of Fame. Either way, New England won a low-scoring and heavily defensive battle, leaving NFL fans sighing and muttering 'there's always next year'. 

You had one job (SB Nation)

MAKING THE SACRED SLOT COUNT

CBS are reported to have put a price of between $5.1-$5.3 million for a 30 second advert slot during the Super Bowl, compared to companies paying around $2.3 million back in 2002. Inflation can be deemed the culprit for such a hike in price, but having a chance to advertise in front of millions of people is worth the expense. Companies want to create as much social media frenzy as they can, and 30 seconds is all the time you need considering the dedication of some fan bases. The combination of both Bud Light and Game of Thrones saw the 'Bud Knight' bested in a joust with Gregor 'The Mountain' Clegane, before a dragon swooped down and burnt the whole paddock down. Hulu spun Ronald Reagan's 1984 campaign ad 'Morning in America' into 'Wake up America, morning's over' to announce the third season of The Handmaid's Tale. Pepsi and Coke also decided to have a small border incursion in the ongoing 'Soda Wars', as Pepsi piped up that it was 'more than OK' according to their celebrity entourage and Coke was adamant that 'different is beautiful'. Oh, and Disney dropped Toy Story 4, Avengers: Endgame and Captain Marvel, just to make sure that all that lovely social media buzz was about them.

Captain America is prettier though (Radio Times)

Yet it is certainly worth mentioning that there are those that fail to make all of that money spent on an advertising slot count. We may be talking about winners here and we all want to discuss the untimely demise of the 'Bud Knight' or the incredibly difficult task facing the Avengers in their gloriously messy universe, but when there are winners there are losers. Mint Mobile compared their wireless prices to chunky milk and made audience stomachs turn; memorable but poorly timed. Turkish Airlines gave Ridley Scott a chance to direct another ad after delivering Apple's iconic '1984' ad, but the magic could not be recaptured. A trailer for a 6 minute short was confusing as a mysterious woman takes a flight to Istanbul and proceeds to brood around the Turkish city. Aussie wine company Yellow Tail managed to get themselves a slot, but when competing with Budweiser and other big players in the alcoholic brand battle you need to pull out all the stops. 'Tastes Like Happy' tasted more like 'corny advert about a beverage no one drinks during an American football game'. Also, why were there so many robots? TurboTax's 'RoboChild' was not a friendly sight for the viewers recovering from having chunky milk shoved down their throats. Certainly one to avoid.

That ain't right (Mint Mobile)

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CBS had the task of broadcasting Super Bowl 53, and drew in an average crowd of just over 98 million US viewers. That's one large number, yet actually continues the downward trend of viewing numbers for the final game of the NFL season. To put it in perspective, around 3.4 billion people watched the 2018 World Cup finals in Russia; a tournament that had so much drama and marvellous moments that it allowed 'Absolute Shambles' to conduct an extremely legitimate and world famous awards ceremony. Streaming numbers for the Super Bowl did increase, with CBS stating how the game was streamed on 7.5 million devices (up 20% from last year) across numerous sources such as CBSSports.com, the NFL app and Verizon's mobile services (e.g. Tumblr). Viewership numbers were affected by a number of factors, including:

• A boycott by New Orleans and much of Louisiana after officials missed a pass interference call that sent the Rams to the Super Bowl at the expense of the New Orleans Saints in the NFC championship game
• Kansas City Chiefs fans being disappointed by losing to the Patriots in the AFC championship game
• The contingent of supporters refusing to watch after the treatment of Colin Kaepernick and his decision to kneel during the national anthem
• Maroon 5 being the halftime show act amidst multiple acts refusing to perform (again, Kaepernick's treatment came into consideration)
• A low-scoring game, but we'll cover that in a bit
• The Patriots being in another Super Bowl

Overall numbers for NFL games have increased this season, despite ongoing issues off the field, striking a strong contrast to the Super Bowl numbers. Anthem kneeling, concussion scandals and 'Deflategate' have all caused concern over whether the NFL was now in a downward spiral, but an average 5% rise in viewership begs to differ. From the 50 most-watched shows of 2018, 46 were NFL games. Crisis? What crisis?

No chill from New Orleans (Times- Picayune)

Across the pond, the BBC and Sky sought to capture the eyes of the British public with their own coverage of the game. While viewing numbers are not yet known (indeed, they never are released if this humble blogger remembers correctly), so it's hard to fully gauge how many watched the Super Bowl. You know it was a large number of people from the amount of interest NFL London games receive, as American cultural imperialism makes itself at home in Great Britain. The BBC could happily boast that their free coverage has no arbitrary ad breaks, meaning that more time could be spent with the charming duo of Osi Umenyiora (a British-born player who won 2 Super Bowls with the New York Giants) and Jason Bell (former player for the Dallas Cowboys, Houston Texans and the Giants). Sky had the slick production value due to their rights over showing live NFL games, which can act as a saving grace for the ludicrous Sky prices and spontaneous advert appearances. Well, at least we can watch the game!

Mark Chapman is there too- he's not too bad (BBC)

THAT'S ALL WELL AND GOOD, BUT DID THE FANS WIN?

No, no they did not. Over the years, despite falling numbers, the Super Bowl has been an excellent source of entertainment. The Philadelphia Eagles won their first championship last year in a wonderful underdog story that made the nation rejoice as New England lost. This came a year after the Patriots fought back from 28-3 down in the 3rd quarter to an eventual scoreline of 34-28 that made everyone mumble their disapproval yet begrudgingly admit that it was an impressive comeback (but seriously, how did the Atlanta Falcons crew up that badly?!). 2019 was not as exciting, despite the Rams competing in their first Super Bowl since moving back to Los Angeles. Even the Patriots players knew they had won a game in such an underwhelming fashion that one would think they would apologise to everyone. When/ if they go to the White House, the team should gather in front of the cameras and deliver a heartfelt and sincere apology to all who had to make it through such an underwhelming Super Bowl.

'Sorry for winning, guys. We'll try and lose next time' (Boston Globe)

This was the largest ever margin that the Patriots have won by in a Super Bowl, yet somehow this was the lowest-scoring one in history. It was certainly a record-breaking Super Bowl, with fewest touchdowns scored and most consecutive drives ending in a punt by one team just being some of the accolades collected by Super Bowl 53. It was a defensive spectacle by both teams, but these were two of the most effective offences this season. Rams running back Todd Gurley scored 21 touchdowns this year, but ran for 35 yards on 10 carries. Brady's first pass was intercepted, with Goff constantly running for his life after all that promise of him being the 'Chosen One' to defeat the Patriots dynasty. This is the Super Bowl, dammit! People are staying up late and forgoing work the next day to watch this sporting spectacle; they don't want to watch a game that's 3-3 at halftime. We have seen exciting draws before, but when these are supposed to be the best teams in the country you demand good service.

Stock footage of Super Bowl spectators, 2019 

'Don't worry, the game may be bad but the halftime show should be better!' was probably the reaction of everyone... how naive. Alarm bells were already ringing after artists such as Nicki Minaj and Rihanna refused to perform. Maroon 5 reportedly struggled to find acts to help out their show, having to settle with Outkasts's Big Boi and Travis Scott. The promise of Spongebob Squarepants performing 'Sweet Victory' turned out to be a brief cameo to introduce Travis Scott and his heavily censored 'Sicko Mode'. Not even Adam Levine stripping could save the show that was already deemed to be a disaster before the band took to the stage. Justin Timberlake's performance last year meant standards were low, and Maroon 5 matched it or only slightly surpassed it. To make matters worse, Big Boi actually managed to reach the 48-yard line in his car, unlike the Rams who punted the night away. Unfortunately, the Rams weren't able to punt away this disappointing and lacklustre Super Bowl. Glad this humble blogger decided to sleep through the night and not plan tactical naps, although would have loved to have seen the male cheerleaders...

Sorry Adam, this stripping is unnecessary (Washington Post)

It was meant to be a game that would deliver so much, as two brilliant offences squared off in Atlanta to delight and dazzle us all. Yet Jared Goff clearly had the jitters on the big stage, and even the Patriots didn't look comfortable about winning such a drab Super Bowl. The dynasty continues, but everyone was too bored to even acknowledge it. Maroon 5's halftime show was certainly below par, a year after Justin Timberlake muted performance which actually could have ruined Super Bowl 52- thank God the Eagles won. Boredom was staved off temporarily with adverts that made fandoms squeal in anticipation with upcoming spectacles courtesy of Marvel and Pixar, not to mention the long overdue return of Game of Thrones. It was a Super Bowl to forget for spectators, and those that boycotted/ slept through Super Bowl 53 certainly feel smug. Next year (touch wood) should see normal service resume and keep us Brits glued to the screen, much to the relief of both the BBC and Sky. All fans want from next year's Super Bowl is simple:

• No Patriots
• Decent halftime show
• Bloody good adverts

Masters of the NFL, do your thing. For now, let's just watch Super Bowl 52 and reminisce of the good times.

Unforgettable (Getty Images)

Ben G 😁 xo