What I Love About Christmas

'Oh, Christmas isn't just a day, it's a frame of mind' - Kris Kringle, played by Edmund Gwenn, Miracle on 34th Street, 1947

From the desk that this blogger spends his working days at, there is a TV situated on the wall opposite. The slides move through statistics, BBC News and the latest version of software released by the company for public consumption. One slide, however, always grabs everyone's attention; the Christmas Countdown. Excited squeals, little jigs and a hurried hand clapping is the common reaction to the upcoming festivities. December is now upon us, and Christmas is on the horizon.

Get pumped

OK, everyone calm down. We all love this time of year but we are adults who have the ability to keep our childish glee in check. Let's just take a minute to compose ourselves... oh forget it, IT'S NEARLY CHRISTMAS!! In case you are getting a feeling of déjà vu, there was a Christmas-themed post last year on the joys of the season, but this time around it seemed fitting to do some sort of listicle. Is it a cop out due to time constraints created by both work and Red Dead Redemption 2? Yes, but the game is so bloody good that you should stop reading this post, unhitch your horse and play what is most certainly the game of the year. Fuck Fortnite and that floss dance; it's all about outlaws, gripping drama and shooting alligators right in the face with a pump-action shotgun.

Squad goals

Right, gone off track a little, let's get back to Christmas. This post will cover 10 things, in no particular order, that fill this humble blogger with joy as time ticks on towards 25 December. Everyone has their own traditions and memories of what makes Christmas special for them, which actually makes Christmas even better since everyone's idea of a perfect Christmas differs from person to person. That right there is the pinnacle of individualism. Before we applaud ourselves for having an independent mind, let's get on with this list. It's time to step into Christmas, to coin the great song by the magnificent Elton John.

EXEMPLARY WINTER ATTIRE

The process of rummaging through cupboards and wardrobes for warm clothing is one that is both alarming and exciting. For one thing, these cosy jumpers and soft scarves all have a dusty smell about them; a smell that announces the arrival of the cold. Yet the tacky but beautiful Christmas jumpers now being worn means that Christmas is on the way, and we are celebrating its upcoming arrival by slipping on a jumper adorned with gingerbread men, snowflakes and other symbols of the season. Autumn eased us all into the realms of dipping temperatures, but now we can go all out with winter clothing accessories. Some are well-prepared to show off their winter fashion choices, while others are ill-equipped for both cloth flaunting and chilly conditions. Either way, all that chunky knitwear means 25 December is on the way.

God of winter attire

'STEPPING INTO CHRISTMAS WITH MMMMMMMMMMEEEEEEEEE'

You should all know that the title of this section is taken from that marvellous Christmas song 'Step Into Christmas', and if you didn't belt it out at the top of your voice then you're not doing Christmas right. Perhaps you're sick of all the Christmas music being played on the radio already, but it's better than the crap that they usually play nowadays. From Wham's 'Last Christmas' to the overplayed and quite frankly awful 'Merry Xmas Everybody', there is no escaping from this genre of music. Christmas carols are also being sung, or shouted if you're singing 'O Come All Ye Faithful', which are usually just as annoying since that means well-wishing children have arrived at your front door. But the trashy music is all part of the fun and you just can't help but sing and do a little jig. Even the most cold-hearted of people admit that Mariah Carey's 'All I Want For Christmas Is You' is a banger. 

This song will never be annoying

SO... MANY... SPARKLY... THINGS

The infamous 'rubber neck syndrome' is rife this time of year as the bright and colourful decorations outside someone's house distracts any who pass nearby. A fun way to show your Christmas spirit turns into a contest in who has the most inventive and intense light show on the street. Simply draping lights around the door just won't do; you need to put Las Vegas to shame. That's just the outside, just wait until you see the tree! Tinsel, ornaments and even more lights ordain the mighty pine tree that stands in the living room, waiting patiently for the presents to begin stacking beneath it. Around the house, even more Christmas-themed decorations are placed to further clarify that it's definitely Christmas. You are completely surrounded by Christmas- and it's bloody wonderful.

Heskey's ready

SHUT IT, THE ADVERTS ARE ON!

Last week, 'Absolute Shambles' published its list of the best adverts that have appeared on British television to show off their Christmas goods. For some reason, we all get so excited about what kind of creative masterclass John Lewis or any other company will supply us this year. The messages may be similar in that no Christmas is complete without buying whatever is being advertised, but once in a while you get an advert that makes you all emotional. It's now become a competition to have the masses pick the best Christmas advert of the year, much like how American companies pull out all the stops when the Super Bowl comes around. As the marketing teams work tirelessly into the night devising the perfect Christmas advert, the public sits in front of their TV sets in anticipation of what the most cunning of marketing strategists can come up with. If it involves an iconic song, a heart-warming message and something adorable, then you're onto a winner. 

For example

THE HOUSE SMELLS OF BAKED TREATS AND OTHER ENTICING CREATIONS

Put on your fanciest apron, for the kitchen is about to become the site of something magnificent. All this Christmas spirit and free time means that the most ambitious of chefs/ bakers fire up the oven to create something magnificent. Baking is a tremendous hobby, and we all get a nice satisfying feeling when we can make food all by ourselves without a parent or another responsible adult looking over your shoulder. Over the last few years, this humble blogger and his mother have spent hours rushing around the kitchen baking or, come Christmas Day, creating an efficient assembly line to make Christmas dinner. All this food is a wonderful sight, yet one would advise avoiding the scales for a while. That would spoil anyone's appetite. We're all beautiful though!

Anyone for Iced Gingerbread Cake?

RIGHT, WHAT CRAP IS ON THIS YEAR THEN?

There are more than just adverts on TV this Christmas time. Now comes the time where channels dedicate themselves to broadcasting Christmas movies or TV specials based around Christmas. As Sky once again unleash their movie channel solely dedicated to showing the best Christmas films around, the analogue channels line up their selection of movies that will allow viewers to binge through to their heart's content. While you could easily watch a Christmas film/ TV special whenever you want (nobody needs an excuse to watch Love Actually, for example), their constant showing on TV gets one rather excited. With plans already in motion to what films will be viewed come Boxing Day, as it's a Goscomb tradition to watch a plethora of entertainment in our PJ's, that Christmas feeling grows stronger. As long as we can all watch Michael Caine muck about with The Muppets in their own version of A Christmas Carol, then one should be satisfied.

Some say it was his greatest role

IT SNOWED FOR A MINUTE- BEST CHRISTMAS EVER

For some reason, we all feel entitled to have a white Christmas- and that's not just because Bing Crosby sings about it all the time. The chilly winter of 2017/2018 preceded the scorching summer in the middle of the year, so naturally you would put a sizeable amount of money on another cold December. It's obviously the grip of global warming that has caused these bizarre weather events, but when you're making snowmen and gallivanting in this winter wonderland you're not really bothered by the impending disaster. With that winter attire already at hand, you're prepared to trudge through the snow to either pick up supplies or warm up with a Christmas pint. Even though we would all be much happier with a snow day while in the middle of the school/ working calendar, a white Christmas is way better.

A gift to the Christmas gods

NO WORK FOR LIKE A WEEK!

Speaking of work, the onset of Christmas means we all get a nice little break from the slug of a 9-5 working day. Even if you have been in a new job for a small amount of time, Christmas leave is a worthy reward for all that work we have been doing. One day we are fumbling around with alarms and rushed breakfasts, the next it's all about lie-ins and a massive fry-up. Those suits or smart casual attire needed for work are now in clothing limbo as it's time not just for all that knitwear, but also for PJ's and other comfy apparel. We lounge about like kings watching crap on our televisions or spending more time robbing banks and galloping across the plains in Red Dead Redemption 2. Cherish this precious time, for it is fleeting and soon that alarm will go off again to herald the return to working life. Make this time count. 

Don't forget the tree though

SOCIALISING AND OTHER SCARY HUMAN INTERACTIONS

At some point, you will have to turn off all that technology and engage in an introvert's worst nightmare; social interaction. Thankfully, the office Christmas party will have eased us all into the mood to actual talk to other human beings, whether it's fuelled by alcohol or not. Friends who have their own busy lives appear once more on instant messaging apps to demand your presence at a gathering to commemorate the Christmas season. Then there are all the family events that require you to make an appearance. Expect awkward chats of how you're doing really well being an adult but actually your life is imploding and its one long series of stressful incidents. Nonetheless, to be surrounded by the ones you love, exchanging gifts and stuffing our faces, is awesome. After the year that this blogger has had, one can be thankful for being surrounded by friends and family. 

Wow, I've made some interesting fashion choices this year...

THE CHRISTMAS SPIRIT AND FEELING LIKE A KID AGAIN

This, at the end of the day, is the entire point of this post. All of the factors listed above all link in to this one final piece of the Christmas puzzle; the spirit of the season and recapturing that childish glee. You have to be one stubborn and moody bastard to wake up on Christmas morning and not feel a rush of excitement about going downstairs and seeing all the presents under the tree. Even at the age of 23, one still looks impatiently at the clock on Christmas morning and fights the urge to kick down the doors to other family member's bedrooms and demand their presence downstairs. That warm feeling of togetherness, albeit for one day, is so glorious that you wish it could last forever. The fact that it doesn't makes Christmas that much more special.

Same GIF two weeks in a row- is that laziness or love?

That bloody Christmas countdown continues to mock and taunt this humble blogger, which seems to have slowed down as it drops down towards 25 December. Yet that won't dampen spirits, because Christmas is literally right around the corner. Before we know it, December will have come and gone and 2019 will arrive on the scene with promises of how this year is going to be a good one. Christmas only lasts a day, so we should all make the most of it while it's around. The next few weeks may be a drag, but once your eyes open on the morning of 25 December, it will all be worth it. That's a promise.

Merry Christmas comrades

Ben G 😁 xo