A year of adulting

It's one of those weeks that I can easily find something to talk about, but I don't want to. I would love to rant about gun control or independence movements, but I'm tired of reading and writing about all the depressing stuff. There's only so much a man can take. 'Tis a burden upon my mind and soul.

Instead, I want to focus on something else. On this exciting encounter, I will be going on about how good at adulting I have become, and how I will look back over the last year or so and realise how far I have come. For some of you, this might be depressing enough to read because being an adult sucks but fear not, because I am still struggling.

The face says it all

Just over two weeks ago, a notification appeared on my Facebook timeline. It came to my attention that it had now been a whole year since I graduated from Plymouth University, therefore my first year of adulting had been completed. It's been a hell of a year, I can tell you that. I even got a notification about how it had been four years since I put all my Interrailing pictures on Facebook. Now that's surreal.

We went to Europe as boys, and returned as men

As mentioned in previous posts, I have spent the last year or so trying to be a teacher (and failing), attempting to be a greenkeeper (and failing) and finding the time and energy to keep myself fit and healthy (that's been a success, thankfully). Post grad life is tough, which I'm sure is no great surprise to the masses of people who obviously read these posts. Thanks for all the fan mail by the way- I love the banter about how I should stop writing and give up on my dreams. You guys are awesome!

Yet there is a light at the end of the metaphorical tunnel, as by next Wednesday I shall be back in employment and start my new job as a Study Supervisor. I'm excited, as I will be earning money and getting experience at the same time. Essentially, I've found myself the perfect job. Everyone be jealous of me.

This is my 'Look how beautiful I am' pose

In addition to my flip-flopping of careers, my initiation into adulthood has seen me become far more independent. I find time to cook meals for myself and can happily get out of bed without my Dad bursting through the door and giving me a small news and weather report. University certainly helped me on my eternal quest for total independence, but the journey has only just begun. Crap, it tires me out just thinking about it.

Even my purchases have become more professional. I still happily flaunt my cash about and buy various items, such as brightly coloured vests or personalised mugs. Around a year ago, I happily spent a good amount of cash on Battlefield One and Call of Duty: Infinite Warfare (with Modern Remastered included of course) and endulged myself in lovely memories of raging. This week, however, I spent my money on books.

Cor blimey, look at all this knowledge

That's right, books. Historical books as a matter of fact. This is all part of my plan to seem more intellectual, and to eventually decorate my classroom when I become a fully qualified teacher. My students will be blown away by how I have studied the campaigns of Alexander, researched post-Roman Britain and obviously how I have thought over the messages brought forward by The Communist Manifesto. Are you proud of me, Chairman Corbyn?

My ocelot is a proud member of the proletartiat

It's also a good thing that I purchased all these books as my laptop decided it would be a great idea to go for a swim. By that. I mean my left hand had a small episode and water fell upon Fuckface the laptop (the name came about since it had panic attacks while I was writing my dissertation). In a scene reminiscent of all those times in movies when someone is rushed to the hospital, my laptop is now in the hands of the computer wizards. Keep Fuckface in your prayers.

My ascension to adulthood is far from complete. I still need to move out, find myself a partner willing to deal with all my shit and determine a more complete career plan besides 'be a teacher and do the History'. The next year or so will be pivotal, and is sure to determine the entire future of the human race. So you should all be nice to me and buy me gifts- the new Wolfenstein looks pretty good, so you all know what to do.

Ben G 😁 xo

P.S. Shout to my dearest mother for allowing me to use her laptop. No laptop would cause me to go insane. No joke.