Skip to main content

Boredom is a wonderful thing

The prospects of employment are on the horizon, with this week full of interviews and plenty of applications. My days of being a sponge on the state are perhaps coming to an end, which fills me with dread. Gone will be the days of Netflix binges and wearing comfortable clothes. Truly, a fate worse than death.

Yet all is not lost! To celebrate my move toward permanent employment, I dug through the treasure that is my collection of games for the PS3 and came upon FIFA 13. Childish glee swept over me, and I proclaimed that I shall take up the reigns of management once more and take Arsenal to the promised land of not being rubbish at football.

My old and dear friend
This was a time travelling experience. Not only was I diving head first into the nostalgia pool of FIFA 13, but also to a strange time in the world of football. Paul Pogba can be bought on loan, Harry Kane spends his days at Norwich and nobody knows what a Jamie Vardy is. Also Monaco are stuck in Ligue 2 and I find that hilarious since they're super rich and champions of France.
Your time shall come
The team that I took over in 2012 is an interesting one. Jack Wilshere and Alex Oxlade Chamberlain were still hot young England prospects, with Andrei Arshavin and Johan Djourou gracing the Emirates turf. Things had to change, and a shortlist began to be developed.

Hindsight is truly a beautiful thing, and I would abuse it here today. Once more nostalgia took a hold of me as I came across the youthful faces of Mario Gotze, Emre Can and Raheem Sterling. Yet the humble budget of £19 million was spent on the likes of Raphael Varane, Julian Draxler and Ibrahima Mbaye. Arsenal would once more become a football powerhouse.

A small selection
I love a good Manager Mode playthrough on FIFA. I immerse myself in the story of one particular team, as the plucky John Lenin scouts the youthful prospects and turns them into demi-gods who rip teams like Manchester United and Barcelona apart with ease and grace. Then comes the inevitable game when you lose to West Brom or Stoke, and that feeling of invincibility is destroyed.

Nevertheless, I have had numerous successes. Among the greatest is taking Plymouth Argyle through 15 amazing years, from a shock 4-3 win over Chelsea in the 2016 FA Cup Final to back to back Champions Leagues at the end of my career. Tears fill my eyes when I look back upon these memories.

Never give up on your dreams kids
January rolls around, and Bacary Sagna asks to leave. Just like in real life, off he goes to Man City and a nice £5 million into the war chest. Then Barcelona comes knocking for Wojciech Szczesny- £15 million, thank you very much. Arsenal are in the money, and in I go for Marc Andre ter Stegen and Danilo. Oh my, it's all coming together now.

Fast times at Arsenal FC
Momentum picks up, and John Lenin finds himself in April, as he and his plucky North London lads aim to go for the treble. Their names would go down in history as one of the greatest teams that have ever kicked a sphere on a bit of grass. Spirits are high as we fly into Barcelona and prepare to do battle with the giants of Catalonia. Morale is through the roof, form is impeccable- victory is assured!

Ah
OK, so that didn't go quite to plan, but this is Barcelona after all. Besides, who needs conitental success anyway? Not John Lenin, I tell you that. Not when you become manager of Russia and install the ambition to destroy the burden of capitalism and get through the knockout stages of the World Cup. With an army of hooligans backing you up, the path to victory is clear.

We reach 19 May 2013, and Arsenal celebrate their first league title since 2004. Although Manchester United bested the plucky Gunners in the FA Cup Final, we won the league so who gives a flying fuck. A truly wonderful start to the career of John Lenin, and only the deities know how this story shall end.

For now, I cherish this moment of joy. My efforts have proved effective, and pundits shower me with praise. Glory has returned to the red side of North London- perhaps my success here can inspire Mr Wenger... I doubt it.

Back on top
I really did enjoy immersing myself once again in the simple world of FIFA 13. Perhaps there will be more posts where I find an old game from my teenage years and attempt to recapture that joy I felt when I first played it. I do feel like Assassin's Creed 2 is calling out to me.

Oh Ezio
Ben G xo 😁

P.S. A small update from the teaching front- I shall be employed in the next few weeks, yet need to decide where I should work. Oh boy, more internal strife.

You do need to look good doing it though
P.P.S. I was at Churcher's College on Tuesday and in some sort of ironic twist I only managed to take one picture, and it wasn't even of the school (or me, amazingly enough)

I just can't get away from turf management 


Labels:

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

The 100th Post: The End of 'Absolute Shambles'

'So long, farewell, auf Wiedersehen, goodbye'- 'So Long, Farewell' from The Sound of Music , 1965 Post Number 100. The bunting has been hoisted out of the cupboard and is now strung up in all its glory. Caterers are hurriedly preparing a lavish spread for the exclusive event that surrounds such a historic moment, which will be attended by the biggest celebrities on the planet. People such as Barack Obama, Sir Patrick Stewart and LeBron James are waiting for the gold envelope to slide through the letterbox and invite them to the prestigious gathering. Celine Dion is warming up her vocal cords to sing a duet with Ed Sheeran, who will perform a special song written by Pharrell Williams. Dwayne Johnson and Channing Tatum will be running security for the night, hoping to keep out any party crashers who want to catch a glimpse of this humble blogger and his famous entourage. Seriously, this makes the Oscars look like a primary school disco. Master of Ceremonies Sadly, ...
Post a Comment
Read more

A Fateful Accusation

'Justice delayed is justice denied'- William E. Gladstone I am not a religious man, yet I am certainly not a militant atheist like Richard 'If you like God, you're stupid' Dawkins. Belief/faith in some sort of deity is comforting for some, and there are a large number of people who believe in the concept of 'divine intervention'. This can be defined as a deity, whether through the power of prayer or perhaps it being a slow day in the afterlife, takes the conscious decision to intervene in our mortal realm and influence a certain chain of events. Miracles are often categorised as the result of divine intervention, and on an overcast 29 March, on the steps outside of St Paul's Cathedral in London, a deity may have given me a helping hand. It certainly isn't on the scale of Jesus walking on water or God sending the Ten Plagues onto Egypt, but in that very moment of time it felt as if 'divine intervention' had just occurred. My mother felt ch...
2 comments
Read more

'Wolfenstein: The New Colossus'- one of the craziest games I've ever played

As I continue my temporary imprisonment in my home, it was time to do some tactical purchases. Thankfully, Christmas is fast approaching so we are now entering a period of big title releases as companies rub their hands in delight over the thought of some big profits. Not going to deny it, it's a wonderful time to be alive. Bethesda  decided it was time to jump back on the Wolfenstein  train and release another installment of their long running series with The New Colossus . Screams of delight pierced the air as I saw the announcement, release trailer and finally game play footage. Look, I'm a very lonely guy; there's not much else to be excited about really. A personal hero If you're unfamiliar with the series, here's a quick run down. It's the 1960s and the Nazis won the Second World War. Things suck, so William 'B.J.' Blazkowicz (emerging from a 14 year coma) continues his Nazi killing ways and does it in a brutal and efficient way. The New Co...
Post a Comment
Read more