Absolute Shambles

'Setting an example is not the main means of influencing others, it is the only means'- Albert Einstein The first major illness of the autumn/ winter season has struck. Thankfully it isn't a pesky cold or a rare tropical disease contracted from some weird foreign food, but is instead one of the sporting variety. The new NBA season has arrived and it promises to be a cracker of a season. Will the Golden State Warriors win their 3rd Championship in a row? Can LeBron James lead the Los Angeles Lakers to glory and push his claim to be the G.O.A.T.? Will the stereotype of white men being unable to jump be broken? Oh my, it's all too much. With the Toronto Raptors 6-0 so far this season, hopes are certainly high for this enthusiastic, yet still learning game by game, NBA fan. Indeed, fireworks have already been set off in the recent clash between the Lakers and the Houston Rockets. After Brandon Ingram (Lakers) fouled the magnificently bearded James Harden (rockets), he t...

'Drugs are bad, m'kay, so, if you do drugs, you're bad, m'kay, because drugs are bad. They can hurt your body, m'kay, cause drugs are bad, m'kay'- Mr Mackey, from the South Park episode 'Ike's Wee Wee, 27 May 1998 *NOTE: I'm not authorising any readers to start smoking cannabis, but if you're that way inclined I won't stop you. It's your life. Just make sure that, if the police search your house and find some, pick a good hiding spot. They don't give the tupperware back either... 17 October shall be a day of great historical magnitude. Sorry to disappoint Mr Henry Goscomb (he turns 25- many happy returns to him, the old bastard) but his birthday shall be eclipsed by news coming out of the United State's cooler neighbour. Cold puns aside, 17 October will see cannabis prohibition come to an end in Canada, making weed legal for purchase and consumption in the country. Uruguay was the first nation to make cannabis legal after ...

'I got a good feeling about this'- Han Solo, Solo: A Star Wars Story , 2018 So this happened... 2018 has been... long. It would be a miracle if anybody has kept up with everything, and we still have two months to go!  Logan Paul kept up his trend of being a prick,   Brexit still sucks  and, of course,  Donald Trump still sits smugly in the White House.  This whole Brett Kavanaugh situation doesn't help either, as the nominee for the Supreme Court snakes his way through the Senate vote despite accusations of sexual assault being raised against him. It appears that the bad guys and things that populate our world are making sure that 2018 is deemed a rubbish year. Indeed, losing Aretha Franklin, Stephen Hawking and Burt Reynolds, to name but a few, doesn't give this year the best of reputations. But hold on a second; let's not throw 2018 into the flames of eternal damnation just yet! Not only are there two months left for the whole thing to turn around, but ...

'Find a job you enjoy doing, and you will never have to work a day in your life'- Mark Twain Starting a new job can be daunting, especially if it's your first one in the adult world. Gone are the days of pot washing, serving food and other run-of-the-mill occupations. That lovely wad of cash was enough to buy some cheap lager and knock off cigarettes for the big party on Saturday night, but that list of expenses has expanded. Rent, car insurance, Netflix subscriptions- it all piles up in the end. Time to ditch the all black attire and don the suit and tie, for it is time to enter the workforce. You knew this day would come, so don't act all shocked. Suited and booted It's like the first day of school. Everything is new; the people, the environment, the schedule etc. Life has taken a drastic new course and there is no slowing down. There's no getting off now, as the safety bar they have on roller coasters has now clamped shut and the slow ascent has begun....